Appreciate the Big One-Eight (18)

Appreciate indeed! This is the last entry for my 2012 Love Dare.
Today, after taking a shower, instead of leaving my towel on the floor for my dad to pick up like I usually do, I hung it up myself.

Ordinarilly I post a few lyrics or a link to a song. I couldn't find a video for this song so I'm posting all the lyrics instead.

Finish Strong by Charles Billingsly:

Lately I've been feeling
Like this race is running me
And I'm fighting to stay focused
On all that I believe
And somewhere in the distance
There's a prize that I can win
And I'm more determined now more than I've ever been

I want to finish strong
Faithful to the Father though the road is long
Crossing that line and still I'm pressing on
Oh, I want to finish strong
Oh, I want to finish strong

I can still remember
What it felt like at the start
When the passion for the missionWas a fire in my heart
And the further that it takes me
It gets easier to see
The best part of the journey now
Is still in front of me

It's not about how fast I run
It's not about how far I've come
It's all about the moment
When I hear My child, well done

Seventeen Ain't So Sweet

Yesterday was my dad's birthday.
We got him an ice cream cake and I was nice to him all day, partially because of his birthday, partially because of the love dare.

Sweet Sixteen

My dad gets up a lot earlier than I do.
Usually he putters around doing dishes and reading before he gets ready for work.
This morning he didn't bring in the paper which is uncharacteristic of him, so I brought it in.

Lean, Mean Fifteen.

The title reflects the day.
Mostly the "mean" part.
It was a terrible day and I could barely utter a word to my dad without getting annoyed.
It not even that he's being unreasonable, I just have a personality conflict with him.
We cannot get along.
As a nice gesture though, I told him that my friend got into his alma mater, which he is obsessed with.
This was information that I would normally withhold because I hate to hear him rant about it.


"Someday, I'll be living in a big 'ole city,
and all you're ever gonna be is mean.
Someday, I'll be big enough so you can't hit me,
and all you're ever gonna be is mean."

--Mean by Taylor Swift

Day Fourteen

I had a track meet today and I let my dad come.
I ususally ban him from any sporting event because, as I've previously mentioned, he's terribly annoying.

"Run to get away.
Keep breathing to move forward.
Pause to look back.
Then carry on."

Lucky Number 13

I decided to switch up the title for variety's sake.
It's also been a really good day for me, lucky if you will.
I went to confession so I'm feeling reaffirmed in my faith and ready to give this love dare some real effort.
My Dad likes to pretend he's cool by fist bumping people but I never partake because it is incredibly embarrassing.
Tonight while we were watching Jeopardy! he was on a roll so he held out his fist for me to bump in recognition of his hot streak.
I did.

Day 12

My dad likes to live vicariously through my athletic career.
He always has suggestions and ways to help me improve even though I run track which he has never done before in his life.
I hate when he tries to tell me what to do because he is the least athletic man ever and thinks he knows everything.
Today, after practice, he told me all the things that I need to do differently.
Rather than get annoyed, I thanked him and walked away.

Day 11

My dad likes to go on walks around our neighborhood.
He always asks if I want to come with him and I never do.
It always ends with me being angry because he tries to talk to me but says all the wrong things.
When he asked me to go on a walk with him though, I went without complaint.

"It's easier to walk away
Better off to face the facts
When love holds you up for ransom
Walk away and don't look back"

 

--Easier to Walk Away by Elton John

Day 10

I am a pretty good student but I always feel like my dad overestimates my abilities.
So today when my report card came, I let him prattle on about my future and whatever success I might achieve without telling him about the very real possibility that I might let him down.
I will always do my best but I know how disappointed he'll be when it's not good enough.

Day 9

My dad went to the doctor to see if he had strep.
This was a huge deal because he loves to remind us that he is the picture of health and has not been to a doctor since he had the mumps when he was seven.
It turned out to be just a sore throat but he's not used to being sick (I know I said in a previous post that he had a cold but a stuffy nose and headache is usually the worst he suffers and that only happens about two or three times a year)
So I refrained from making fun of him for being a baby about a sore throat.

Day 8

Today my mom and I did the weekly grocery shopping.
I got my dad the hostess cupcakes that he likes.

Day 7

My dad has been in New York for Elaine's wake and funeral.
Today, I called him and tried to treat him like a friend who needs comforting.
I offered kind words and didn't cry, despite the fact that I wasn't allowed to miss school for the funeral and was generally upset.

"Lights will guide you home
and ignite your bones,
and I will try and fix you."
--Fix You by Coldplay

Day 6

My dad is an only child so our family is really close with his friends from growing up because they're the closest things to brothers he has.
I refer to them as my uncles as well.
On Saturday, Uncle Kevin lost his wife.
She had a long battle with cancer and it finally claimed her.
We've all been struggling with the loss, especially my dad.
He loved her like a sister.
So today, and for the past few days, I've been trying to comfort him and make myself available to talk if he wants to.

Rest in Peace, Elaine.

Day 5

I shared my sandwich with my dad last night.
That may seem insignificant but I never share food.

Panera Bread is my life!

Day 4

My sister is away at college and my dad really hates the distance.
Today when he was speaking to her on the phone, I stayed in the room with him so that he wouldn't feel like I'm as far away.



"Oh darling, don't you ever grow up
Don't you ever grow up, just stay this little
Oh darling, don't you ever grow up
Don't you ever grow up, it could stay this simple"

--Never Grow Up by Taylor Swift

Day 3

My dad's entire life operates on punctuality.
Being fifteen minutes early is on time for him.
However, he caught a cold this weekend and was pretty slow getting to work this morning.
We leave separately for work and school and he usually is first but today I was ready before he was. So I dawdled a little to let him beat me out the door and still feel on time.

Day 2

My post secondary education is pretty hot topic with my dad.
In fact, there's rarely a day when he doesn't bring it up.
Today, instead of fighting over our different ideas for my future, I listened. I tried to respond calmly and rationally, which for me is incredibly difficult.
I hope it gets easier.

"ransom notes keep falling out your mouth
mid-sweet talk, newspaper word cut outs
speak no feeling no I don't believe you
you don't care a bit,
you don't care a bit"
-Hide and Seek by Imogen Heap

Day 1

I can already tell that this is going to be a difficult 40 days.
When my dad and I see each other, we just start yelling.
He makes it so hard for me to be nice so I'm starting simply by praying for him.

Haha small joke. Only kidding. I still like this song though.

Day -1

For those of you who have ever seen the movie "Fireproof," you'll understand what a Love Dare is.
For those of you who haven't, let me explain:
My religion teacher assigned us a Love Dare for the upcoming season of lent.
We are to pick a person that we interact with everyday but don't necessarily have the best relationship with.
I chose my dad.
We've always struggled to connect and this is the perfect opportunity to change that.

Today is entitled negative one because the Lenten season starts tomorrow and that'll be when I take on the task of repairing our relationship.